Save Me...

Here is my new book to get me through my cardio at the gym. I have to say that it isn't doing what Hunger Games did for me. I am not completely entranced like I was with book number one. I am thinking about re-reading books 2 and 3 since I plowed through them because I couldn't get enough! But I will tell you that reading hard cover books at the gym is not as easy as a paperback!

Save Me is interesting enough, short chapters, an interesting story line and for all the mom's out there...it is definitely relate-able. The question in the beginning of this book is if you were in a crisis situation would you save the children around you first or your child that you knew was in the other room. As a mother and a teacher I feel like I would save whoever was around me, hoping and praying that my daughter was afforded the same consideration wherever she may be. But it raised another question that I think is thought-provoking...if you were taking two children home, yours and a friends and both required booster seats, would you put your child in the booster seat or your friends child?

It definitely made me think about actions and decisions made in a second that while often turn out okay could have dire consequences for all involved. It all goes down to trusting instincts and that Mommy intuition that we all have!

Hope you have a fabulous weekend!

<3, J

Thankful and Grateful...Same thing?

thank·ful

  [thangk-fuhl] 

adjective

feeling or expressing gratitude; appreciative.

grate·ful

   [greyt-fuhl] 

adjective

1.

warmly or deeply appreciative of kindness or benefits received; thankful: I am grateful to you for your help.

2.

expressing or actuated by gratitude: a grateful letter.

3.

pleasing to the mind or senses; agreeable or welcome;refreshing: a grateful breeze.

I would say so. 

This week has been a difficult one. Henry left on Saturday night. Heading East for who knows how long. Cruz got a fever on Sunday night after a fun birthday party and now Victoria is sick. But here is what I am grateful for today. 

1. A job that allows me the opportunity to stay home with my children when they really need me. 

2. A co-worker that takes on extra duties to make sure the class and students run smoothly and as a mother understands what I am going through.

3. My mom who was able to stay home from work for 2-days in order to take care of my little monkey boy. 

4. Good Doctors that know what is going on with my kiddos, are always patient and receptive to my concerns and take me seriously even though I don't have an M.D. at the end of my name. 

5. A husband who is my best friend. I miss him fiercely when he is gone. The phone just isn't the same when I just want to be snuggled up next to him on the couch or looking at him across the table while eating dinner. 

6. My husbands job/career. It is the best out there in the trucking industry and even though it takes him away...we are truly blessed that he works for that great company. 

7. My little Victoria. She isn't so little anymore in size, but she is still my little girl. 

8. I am thankful that I comfort her. That even just by me being next to her she feels a little better. 

9. Music. All kinds....pop to country I love it all. 

10. Nice people. In this county where if you put on your turn signal the car behind you feels the need to speed up...it is so refreshing when a random stranger is nice and polite. 

11. Facebook. It allows me to connect with my hubby when he is on the road through pictures and sweet words that keep us going through the week. 

12. Pinterest. Cause a girls gotta dream. ;) 

So that's my top 10 this week. I will continue to be thankful and grateful for all that I have and all that is given to me on a daily basis. 

"Happiness cannot be traveled to, owned, earned, worn or consumed. Happiness is the spiritual experience of living every minute with love, grace, and gratitude."

Denis Waitley

<3, J

281 pounds....17 pounds gone!

So it has almost been a month...well 25 days to be exact.  17 pounds have gone, three more this week. But I must confess...last Friday I "cheated" a little bit. By cheating I will say that I still ate healthy, fresh, home made food. But I had some simple carbs. I didn't go overboard but I did have a potato and some tortillas and believe me I paid for it the next day. I never realized how eating like that made me so sick. Gassy, bloated, just painful. So I was right back to what I know is true for my body. Lots of veggies and lean protein.

The one area where I am focusing on right now is eating until I am satisfied...not stuffed to the gills, ready to explode, FULL!!! So I am stopping when I sense that and encouraging my little girl to do the same. It is working for both of us! She is starting to say "I think I am done" and she is not asking for extras after we are done with dinner. You see I have had this mindset ingrained in me since I was a little girl spending most of my meals with my depression-era grandparents. Waste not-want not. My little grandma would spend her day cleaning, cooking and watching soaps and when it came time to eat the dinner she just spent 2 hours making, she would serve us and then go outside and take some time for herself.

I was a normal 5 year old that didn't really like stewed tomatoes or onions or....the list could go on and on. Sitting with my Grandfather eating "supper" was like torture to me. He wouldn't let me get up until I cleaned my plate. Sometimes he would get down right offended that I wouldn't eat that stewed tomato. But I learned quickly to eat quietly and quickly and if there was something to awful to bear, my sweet Grandma would swoop in after Grandpa settled into his chair for the evening and she would feed my scraps to the dog, all the while telling me not to say anything to him. I would skip in to Grandpa's living room and when he would ask if I finished all my food, I would keep my promise to Grandma and tell him "Yes", where he would then nod his head approvingly.

Normally I didn't have a problem clearing my plate. My mom (and grandma) are fantastic cooks. Enchiladas, tacos, macaroni casserole are my favorites...to name just a few. I have had an affinity for Mexican food since I was born. But I never learned when or even how to stop. I would just eat until I was stuffed. We didn't want to waste it. ;)

But looking deeper into the meaning that food has held for me all of my life, I see that it was time that I got to spend with my mom and my grandma cooking. I always was my mom's little prep cook, frying tortillas, grating cheese, setting the table, making the Kool-aid, helping clean up after dinner. We celebrated with food and the process in making it. It was time for us to just hang out after a long day at school and all of the long hours she worked in order to provide for us. Cooking became a ritual of spending time with each other, a necessity that became much more in the process to me. I still love cooking with my mom on the holidays and random dinners that I invite myself to. It is still a source of comfort to me just to have her with me. Its not about the food....just the company.

So that has been my focus this week. I make smaller portions, serve myself smaller portions, eat slower, wait for longer periods in between serving myself more food and I always find that I don't want more. We play outside before dinner while the veggies are steaming and have a dance party after dinner instead of eating ice cream. What my little girl was craving clearly was more time with me. It is clear that she was doing what she saw...recommending food establishments because I was always eating out...but now is asking for dance parties and books before bed instead of food and TV.  This shift is just what we have been looking for.

<3, J

Sending love through sunsets....

Office With a View

Lucerne, CA

April 2012

Our Coach's gift

So here is the cute gift idea we are giving the assistant and head coach for Victoria's softball season-2012. I think it came out fantastic!

Click here to view this photo book larger

Create your own personalized photo books at Shutterfly.com.

Thankful its Thursday...

Thursdays....oh glorious Thursdays....my favorite day of the week. Thanksgiving is on a Thursday...which also happens to be my favorite holiday :)...I digress.

Time to reflect on the week that has almost passed and look forward to the weekend that is almost here. I was born on a Thursday....what's the saying...Thursday's child has far to go....well its true. I am loving this journey that I am on. I love that I am constantly learning, constantly being tested in my beliefs and what I think, constantly striving for something more. Not that I am restless...just a wanderer. Spontaneous. Ready to go at a moments notice.

It is these character traits that shock me at times that I went in to teaching. It can be so boring and mundane. Day in and day out...same subjects, same faces, same sameness. But being in Special Ed has its randomness and each day is something new. I am thankful for that. But I feel drawn to the classroom. Not all the political crap that I have to wade through on a daily basis....parents upset that there isn't enough homework, or some that there is too much...so many different personalities to deal with and of course heightened emotions when it comes to their children. But I love teaching. I feel it in every fiber of my being. The ability to be creative and show children a different way to learn, to open their eyes to a different place they have never been, to foster self-esteem and a love for learning that goes far beyond the classroom. That is what I do best.  My passion is teaching but hand in hand with that it is the ability to be creative. When that is stifled in me...I am at a loss.

But these things I know for sure.

I know that I am an incredibly blessed person.

Blessed with this man....

and these kids....

and my closest, oldest, sister-friends I can count on one hand...

my family...

and my gorgeously grounded no-nonsense mother who always has been my steady...

I am blessed with an incredible knack for being able to call bull-s*&! when I see it, for being a caretaker and a fighter for the underdog and my intuition that is always spot-on. I know now that I am better than I thought I was. I have resolve that I thought I had lost somewhere along the road. But I found it again. I am getting back in sync with my own personal rhythms that soothe my soul and nourish myself and the people around me.

This week has been full of challenges that I met head on. I came into the week feeling like it was going to be great. It wasn't, but I made it great. I didn't let the crap drag me down.
I am learning to...

Goes hand in hand with feeling lighter and the weight I have been dropping. Kinda hard to drop that and still have the same old pissy attitude that I carry around sometimes. So today I am recognizing all that I am grateful for, which is so many things. I am blessed that my list is so long.

Looking forward to this wonderful weekend...I get two solid days with my hubbie before he is off on the road again for god knows how many weeks.

<3, J

18 days...14 pounds :)

So it has been another great week. I am focused on how I feel...lighter, more energized, less aches and pains and less TV being watched :)

It has been good and continues to not really be a struggle. I am enjoying this mindshift more than I thought I would. We planted a garden, cooked fresh almost every night (with the exception of eating out a couple of times), food is savored and not choked down in the car as we are rushing from place to place.

It has been an adjustment for my little girl. But I see the changes in her too. She wants to be outside to play with her brother. Zucchini is now a favorite vegetable instead of just Broccoli and I have not been cooking rice with every meal and they haven't said a word. Its amazing how sweet everything is that shouldn't be. We went to pick up stix because I wanted Chinese food....bought their house chicken and steamed vegetables and I could barely eat the chicken because of how sugary it was! It was like eating cake with that super sugary gross frosting. ;)

But mostly what I am taking away from this last week of my current mindset is that I feel so good. I feel better in my clothes which are falling off. I also discovered a little trick for me that makes me want to go to the gym.....ready for it....The Hunger Games. Now I know that I am WAY behind the curve on this one. I didn't even think that I wanted to be on the curve, but I started to read this book for a student of mine that I am trying to motivate to read. I made a deal with him that if he read the book and passed the comprehension quizes that I would be making for him that I would take him to see the movie. Well I started reading it while on the elliptical machine one day and next thing I knew I had been on that machine for 60 minutes! I made that book my "gym book" where I would only read it while at the gym and I could not wait to go to the gym everyday. I am now on to the second book of the series...but can't help to think....what am I going to read after I am done with that series??? Suggestions???

Make it a great week!

<3, Jen

Office with a View: Shamrock, Texas

Sending love through sunsets.

<3, J

Motivation...

   287 pounds. 11 pounds gone for good. So it has been a week and a half since I made my committment to a better me, a better life and a better family and here are the things that have been working for me. I started playing little mind games with myself and thought...oh I will start this when I start Spring Break...it is going to be too hard to do it during my last week at school...and then I thought...HELLOOOO!!!! You are doing it again! So I committed to eating better and doing what I know works for me and that is cutting out all simple carbs. I brought my George Foreman grill to work and started grilling a chicken breast every day for lunch along with a bag of fresh broccolli that I steamed in the microwave. My major bugaboo is always breakfast...and since I am out the door before 6:30 most mornings...my go to spot is always Jack-in-the-Box, where I order total and complete badness at 6:50 every morning. Well I went there anyway and asked for a side of eggs and a side of sausage...along with my diet coke of course....and my food was only $1.60. Can you believe that?? So that is what I am sticking with. Of course I am changing it up so that I don't get bored...but right now when I am in a hurry I know what my back up plan is.

     That is what is the most important part of all of this...planning. So I am losing weight and holding on to more cash. :) Which is never a bad thing ;). This week has been easier...I am hitting my stride with this and falling into my old routine that is all things good. Lots of fresh food, nothing from a package and I am feeling fantastic. The bloat is gone. I am going to the gym and enjoying it. I am also reading the Hunger Games, which makes an hour on the elliptical feel like 20 minutes. I navigated the candy filled Easter weekend with ease. I am lucky that I am not typically a candy girl. I think peeps are disgusting...and give me a cadbury egg and I am heading for the hills. But peanut butter eggs....now you got me. But I was able to focus on the goal at hand...go out with two different families and navigate their buffets with ease. The old Jenna would have said "it's the holidays...just indulge," but this Jenna was able to keep a logical head.

    My co-worker, who is a tri-athlete and wakes up at the crack of dawn each morning to run 6 miles before work, asked me one day if all the fast food that I eat makes me bloated and gassy...I told her no. I was quite sure that was the case, but I see now how it was just another lie I was telling myself about the food I was eating. Being off the "junk" for a week and a half now has proven that to me.

See you at the next weigh-in ;)

~Jen

Office With A View